Heck yes. This is my last review of this year. Disappointment fills the room.
Tim lives in a world with him, his dad, and his mom. Little did he know, he was about to experience a huge change. His parents receive a baby from a taxi, since, well, Dreamworks. Francis then competes with this baby for the attention of his parents. One night when both of his parents are asleep, Tim hears a voice coming from his baby brother's room. When he walks in, he sees his brother on the phone speaking. He then finds out that his brother works for Baby Co, a company run by babies who stay babies forever. This makes sense, of course, if you've ever worked at Baby Co. These two bicker for a while until Puppy Co's CEO becomes bad. This part's boring, but eventually Tim and the boss baby decide to become brothers forever. This movie was cute. It was pretty mediocre, but it was really cute. The bond Tim and the boss baby grow over the course of the film made me smile a fair bit. I couldn't really relate to anything in the movie since I'm a disgusting only child, but I enjoyed myself. It's probably in the lower half of movies I've seen this year, but I'm glad I still watched it.
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The Incredibles are back and better than ever. In the near future where superheroes are outlawed, Helen and Bob are offered a job to bring superheroes back -- but only one of them can join. Winston chooses Helen to join his cause, while Bob becomes a stay-at-home dad. Okay, this movie filled up my nostalgia, and the story was pretty dope. I'm a fan.
This movie was outstanding. I loved it. The whole plot was great, even though it sounds boring. Listen... "14 years after the release of The Incredibles, Bob comes back as a stay-at-home dad, while Dash juggles math homework and Violet goes through some boy troubles." This was amazing, though, and the whole storyline with Helen was pretty great. Screenslaver was a fleshed out supervillain, which I didn't expect. It's weird, as a child I would have not followed along with how he had a decoy that Helen caught, but as an angsty teenager I picked it up immediately. I wouldn't call this a children's movie, since I think anyone could enjoy this. Especially a nostalgic angsty teenager. A poor thief is living in ancient Japan and minding his own business. Suddenly, he's told that he looks like the warlord Shingen. He's then assigned to play his double in a modern take on an ancient Japanese samurai story. The Shingen was dying, so the thief ended up replacing him entirely. Oh boy, let's get into this review.
I didn't like this movie. Not because it was necessarily bad, but I don't think I could ever enjoy a movie that's not in English. Of course, there were good parts, such as the artsy scene that's placed above, but overall it just felt like a drag. I do have to say, this is the best foreign film I've seen all year. I really wish I enjoyed it more, but in this universe, I think it was pretty negligible. Clarice is a young woman looking to work for the FBI. She lands an internship and we see her get assigned a task that would spook anyone, talking to a serial killer. Hannibal Lector is infamous for killing and eating his victims, which doesn't sound too appetizing. I was ironically eating lunch while watching the scene where he bites off a guard's cheek. Anyways, Clarice questions Hannibal Lector about the identity of a serial killer they're looking for over the course of the movie. He emotionally manipulates her through the whole thing to try to get to her head. In the end, Clarice saves the day! Woo!
Okay, this movie was great. I'm not sure why I liked it so much. The plot was odd, since everyone would expect Hannibal to be the bad guy. But, nope, it's some other guy named Buffalo Bill. Something I definitely have to praise it for was the absence of cliches in the horror genre. There weren't any jumpscares in the entire film in my opinion. I also liked how Hannibal functioned in his character. Yes, I would have loved to see him out chomping civilians' faces off, but the fact that it seems like he's helping the FBI is cool to me. I guess I don't have much else to say, other than Clarice's accent is distracting. Like, it would have been dope if I didn't laugh during the lamb scene, but still, it was fine. Also, the scene where Hannibal ate that guy's cheek was epic. Definitely miles better than the final showdown between Bill and Clarice in my opinion. A little orphan boy named Billy gets sent to a new foster home with a loving family. At first, he seems closed off and doesn't really seem to want to be a part of their family, but then, he becomes a wizard. He gets teleported to a wizard's lair whose name is Shazam and becomes a superhero. He and his friend, Freddy, find this amazing. They soon become popular across the city for the stunts Billy can pull off. Trouble arises when Thaddeus Sivana, a man who is jealous of Billy's newfound superpowers, tries to take the superhero down. Through the power of friendship, Billy wins in the end.
This movie was great. I immediately recognized Jack Dylan Grazer and Ross Lynch for their roles in this film, which is a surprise I don't often experience. One thing I was not expecting was that this movie is a hardcore comedy. It probably made me laugh more than Thor Ragnarok did, and that movie was pretty hilarious. I liked the satirical nature it had throughout. Instead of taking the superpowers granted upon Billy seriously and immediately trying to save the world, he decides to have some fun at first. Another surprise was a handful of scenes towards the end that were heavily dramatic. Three big events happened all at once which I was not ready for. One of my favorite scenes in film of all time would have to be when Thaddeus was giving his "villain speech" from afar and Billy couldn't hear what he was saying. Shazam! is a satire and a superhero movie all in one, which is something I can't praise it enough for. (Also, Thomas said he was reviewing this movie this weekend too (we saw it together) and it would be hilarious if you acted like you were mad at him for reviewing the same thing I did) Aaron and Dave both work on a TV show called "Skylark Tonight". They learn that Kim Jong Un, North Korea's leader, is a huge fan of their show and wants to set up an interview with them. The CIA learn about this interview and decide to step in. They ask Aaron and Dave to try to assassinate Kim Jong Un as a secret operation. Of course, hilarity ensues during this mission. On the path to meet Kim, they learn that North Korea isn't as beautiful as it may seem and realize the people there are being tortured. But, of course, this is a comedy, and I thought it was...
Outstanding. I really loved all of the jokes in this film and thought it was overall hilarious. The fact that Aaron and Dave both started to become friends with Kim Jong Un was hilarious. My favorite parts were, of course, the Katy Perry scene, along with the satirical military jokes, such as shooting a tank and calling it "awesome". I think this movie received tons of backlash from North Koreans. Well, North Koreans who have access to movies. It's offensive, it's mildly idiotic, but all in all, this. was. great. (This is a rated PG review, but this documentary is a hard R. Viewer discretion is advised.)
The Brobergs are a family of five that live in Idaho. Yes, the one with the potatoes. They're greeted by a new resident in their neighborhood who they eventually call "B". B has a family of his own and share qualities with the Brobergs. As time progresses, he becomes more and more intrigued with Jan, who is around 12 at the time. Eventually, B kidnaps Jan after brainwashing her and they set out into an adventure. She was found after her kidnapping and her parents decided to drop the kidnapping charges in exchange for B to not expose embarrassing secrets about them. A few years later, Jan runs away from home to be with B again. B has no idea where Jan is, so the FBI try their best to find her. They find her with B and arrest him as they rightfully should have. This thing was trippy. My first thoughts were obviously how stupid the parents were. They sacrificed their child's dignity just to cover up mistakes they themselves made in the past. Afterwards, I watched modern interviews with Jan and she explains that her parents weren't fully at fault because they were manipulated. This may be true, but that's dumb. The lies and actions he bestowed upon Jan were heartbreaking. I can see why this documentary received major backlash, because, in my opinion, even though it's really good and I'd recommend it to everyone, the parents in it are just nonredeemable. All in all, this was a great watch. (SPOILERS because I had to talk about the ending to this one duh)
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 opens up with one of the best credit sequences ever. Baby Groot dances around while the Star Lord, Gamora, Drax, and Rocket are fighting this squid looking thing. Shortly after, Rocket stole some batteries from the Soverign race, who aren't too happy about it, and attack the Guardians' ship. They then crash land on a planet and meet this guy named Ego, who says he's the Star Lord's dad. It kind of reminded me of that one Marvel movie that I can't put my finger on where Hawkeye went back to his home and everyone was kind of just lounging there in their suits. Eventually, Ego disintigrated into tons of little Ego pieces and Yondu dragged the Star Lord into space. I didn't feel too attached to Ego when this happened, so I didn't care as much as I would've liked to. There's a lot more character development in this one compared to the last, which turned out to be... ...not too bad. I found the latter half of this movie to be a little boring, but other than that, I was hooked. Some of the highlights were, as mentioned before, the opening credits, the fight with the Soverign race, Ego's death, and post-credits. For some reason, I feel that Vol. 1 was more of my style. Maybe because I'm not the biggest fan of movie sequels, but whatever. Vol. 2 was still pretty dang good. I like how they went away from the typical Marvel mold of explosions and fights all of the time and tried something different in terms of learning about the Star Lord and Gamora's families. Not my favorite Marvel movie, but it wasn't bad by any means. Bruce Almighty wants to be an anchorman on a local TV show. He doesn't get the job and flips out at God. God, who is Morgan Freeman, as it should be, decides to give Bruce infinite power. Bruce then uses this for his own selfish needs, providing funny moments along the way. This story includes tons of cool celebrities, so it must be great, right?
Well... no. I was expecting this movie to be at least decent, but honestly, I didn't like it. It may just not be my taste, since I can see how this movie could be appealing to the general audience, but it wasn't my cup of tea. There were moments where I laughed a fair bit, especially the trumpet scene, but still, the movie just fell short. I think it's because of how basic the story was. Morgan Freeman played such a stereotypical God role and I honestly didn't enjoy him in this one. Steve Carell wasn't too funny either, which really threw me off. This movie was overall super forgettable and easily on the worst half of my list for this year. It's no Birth of a Nation, only few films can be as great as that one. That was a joke, I'm just trying to distract myself from the fact that I didn't like this movie with such good potential. This is a story of three nerds (Gus, Richie, and Clark) (yes, the actor who plays Clark was also Napoleon Dynamite) who never had a chance to play baseball as kids because they were seen as losers. After encountering a kid getting bullied by a baseball team, they play the bullies at a game. Later that night, the coach, who used to go to school with the three, confronts them. Gus tells him off, then they leave the Pizza Hut buffet that looked really delicious. They meet that one kid's dad, Mel, who is a billionaire and helps them make a team. They play in a league and have a huge following until it comes out that Gus was a bully as a kid instead of the facade he was putting on. Mel makes a deal with the devil or something like that in order to build a baseball stadium in 24 hours, where The Benchwarmers and those bullies from earlier play each other. Gus, Richie, and Clark decide to let kids who were just like them play instead of them, where they lose 46-1. The other team lets them score a point because they were jealous of their freedom. They celebrate at Pizza Hut because of course they do and Gus realizes he's going to become a father.
I watched this movie because I haven't seen it since I was 7 (give or take) and I was not disappointed. I can see why critics overall give this movie average reviews and I can also see why it has a cult-like following. I enjoyed it a fair bit, it seemed much shorter while watching it again though. The constant conflict with Gus was a reason why I liked this movie a fair bit. The only thing I didn't really like was how Carlos stomped on his hand, I mean, it adds extra conflict, but it just seemed unnecessary to the plot. Clark and Richie were both hilarious as I remembered. Gus is surprisingly amazing at baseball, which makes Clark and Richie's failures even better. There's practically only one person on their team and they made it to a tournament. Howie and Carlos were both funny as heck too. I felt that this movie kept me hooked more than the others, probably since I knew a general summary of it the whole time. This movie was great, but I'd have a hard time recommending this to people who are 14 or older. It's childish humor, which I love, but it's not the most appealing movie of all time. Don't get it misconstrued, I like this movie and would definitely watch it again again. Joel is a hopeless romantic. Valentine's Day is coming up and he doesn't have any clue who his sweetheart could be. He went on a train and met this girl named Clementine. They fell in love and were a perfect match. Clementine's memories of this were conveniently erased, Joel was heartbroken, so he decided to get the procedure himself, as any normal person would do to get over heartbreak. He contacts Dr. Mierzwaik, whose name I immediately googled when I was making this review, in order to do this. However, as his memories fade, he begins to remember everything and tries to fight back in his attempt to regain his memories.
Great scenes in this movie were a'plenty. There were moments in the story where we found Joel so vulnerable it honestly made me uncomfortable. Not in a bad way, such as having to turn off the movie, but just the fact that we learned so much about him. One quote that comes to mind is along the lines of "why do I fall in love with every girl that gives me attention?" Another scene that hit me *points to chest* right here was when Joel found out that Clem had her memory erased. The way he looked when he saw her new boyfriend was heart wrenching. The tapes were a final touch that sealed the deal for making this a great movie. Wow. Just, wow. I was really excited to write this review after watching this film, so I looked up people's reviews on it while trying to gather my thoughts. One person in particular called it "a love story in reverse", which is entirely true. I didn't really put two and two together while watching it, but it takes everything an average love story has and turns it around. I loved this formula, I was expecting them to have a terrible breakup and get back together in the end since they were in love at the beginning, but this was something I never could've guessed. This is a Valentine's Day movie, no question. It's not sprinkled with the holiday like Christmas movies are, which gives it charm. But, alas, I loved it. This movie should be talked about more. Two adult men who still live with their parents become step brothers when their dad and mom get married. They face some troubles while trying to blend families, but the two boys soon learn that they have things in common and get along well. The partnership of Brennan (Will Farrell) and Dale (John C. Reilly) cause their family to deal with their nasty sense of humor and leads to some funny scenarios. They even rented a helicopter to face a group of middle schoolers to get revenge on Brennan's high school bully by beating up his son in an absolutely hilarious fighting scene. Antics like these cause their parents to worry about them, and worry they do.
This movie was absolutely hilarious. Never would I think that my teacher that loves to follow the rules would recommend me such a vulgar movie and I loved it. I was thrown off by all of the absolutely unexpected dirty jokes and actions Brennan and Dale pulled off. One of my favorites was their parody of The Lonely Island's "I'm On a Boat" which almost made me spit out my drink. Another amazing scene was when the boys built a bunk bed and Dale did the now cliche of jumping on the top and crushing his brother. These scenes, of course, were just a hint of the comedic genius in this movie. I could go on, but I don't want to sound like a broken record by stating everything that I found funny, including the tree house, drums, and the multiple scenes Dale talked about Brennan's mom. This movie was outstanding and watch it, like, right now. Just drop your grade book and go watch it. EDIT: forgot to mention the Brennan has a mangina scene. Absolutely hilarious Happy Gilmore always loved hockey as a child. His dad took him to all of the hockey games he could, until he was hit in the face by a puck (I think it's called? sports are dumb). Happy then moved in with his grandma. Fast forward to when Happy's an adult and he learns that his grandma didn't pay around $200,000 in taxes. Happy is distraught when he hears this news and doesn't know how he's going to pay for the house in 90 days until he learns that he's amazing at golf. His anger and passion for hockey was a perfect and unsettling transition for him. He enters a competition and has fun with it, trying to ignore the massive skill of Shooter McGavin, aka the literal worst. His coach dies from a HILARIOUS scene with an alligator, I swear I was laughing at that for minutes. Happy beats Stupid McGavin in the competition who proceeds to steal his gold jacket but was chased down by Happy's friends.
This movie was great! It admittingly wasn't anything special compared to what else I've watched in my lifetime, but it was a goofy comedy by Adam Sandler that was actually fantastic. I don't have an opinion on the matter but I know Adam Sandler's movies are usually hated and I can safely assume that Happy Gilmore was his peak. The whole movie was enjoyable and never really lost my attention. Some of my favorite scenes was when Happy first hit the golf ball and hit a man's house, face, and wife with golf balls, Happy's rage on live TV, and, of course, the alligator scene. I'm not sure how whatsoever but I've definitely scene the mini-golf and alligator scenes before. I never really overanalyze movies when I watch them, but I immediately noticed the subplot of how Happy still wanted to be a hockey player. That's an internal conflict *bam* guess what AP Lang exam I'm coming for you. Back to the movie, I liked it a fair bit and it would be an easy recommendation to anyone since it's so universal. (This one's from September 26, 2018, so sorry if my immature self made a terrible review)
Taking place during the Progressive Era, Coach Boone (Denzel Washington) is appointed the coach of a high school football team. The year he started coaching was the first year that their team consisted of people of different races. Boone saw how the team members were racially segregated from each other and tried his best to integrate them as one team. Through the ups and downs of the season, their team came out on top. This story brings light to a true story taking place during the 50's, where American citizens were trying to conquer racism and treated every human as equals. This film took the tense times of racism in America and painted a picture that was truly inspiring. It took these two groups of races and show their points of view of each other in the beginning and the end. The way the black men were treated 100 years after slavery was abolished was disgusting to watch. Living in a world where racism is nearly universally frowned upon, it's crazy to think that discrimination against blacks was an everyday occurrence. There was a happy ending of course, this was from the year 2000 after all. In the end, they all worked together like a team, because of course they did. It was in a way that seemed completely natural and wasn't forced, which was the complete opposite of what I expected. When Gerry (Ryan Hurst) was hit by the truck, it was a somewhat unexpected moment that really turned the team for the better. They saw that he was hurt and wanted to win the championship for him, which they did because, again, of course they did. The opening and closing scenes were Gerry's team visiting him, which was a touching moment that was cleanly done (other than the fact the girl was just like "Gerry died 10 years later whoops"). It's one of those late 90's early 2000's movies that are kind of cheesy and don't work in some spots, but they just somehow hit you in the feelings and bring you back to a simpler time. I would definitely recommend this to anyone who's looking for a movie that you can just get lost in. The cheesiness got me again and I just can't directly insult this film. It was good! Great, even! It's around 90 A.D. and chain mail is "in". Through a tale of comedy like no other, we see the adventure that the Knights of the Round Table and how they try to obtain the Holy Grail. They're lead by King Arthur, a knight who is not as brave as he might seem. What makes this movie so popular among fans is the structure that has become a style of historical comedy where all of the characters are the exact same as they are depicted in this legend, but they come across obstacles that are wacky and definitely out of left field. This skeleton earned its muscles and skin and other anatomical terms that aren't coming to mind because it's a weekend through its accuracy of the time it takes place in, which this movie nailed in my opinion. They then face off against a wizard and rabbits for some reason before getting interrupted by some police. Apparently this is a reoccurring motif in Monty Python movies and I love it.
This movie was amazing! I was expecting it to be a bit outdated and therefore unfunny, but I was blown away by how many times I laughed. The scene that I remember the best was the witch scene, which I've seen a million times for some reason. The whole movie is so funny and never really seems to lose its momentum much. I feel like the historical accuracy of the movie was pretty great, even though I'm not too sure on that. I definitely like how they took ideas from the time, such as the house of ladies who medically help men, and then making it... a whore house. Sorry mom. The dialogue was something that immediately grabbed my attention, since they talk like medieval Englishmen. Overall, this movie was great and I would definitely watch it again and recommend it to anyone. It's probably gonna be one of those movies I show my kids when they're really young, young enough to not understand anything, but old enough to say "hey, I've seen that before!" Hopefully they won't have any questions because at times this movie is d-i-r-t-y. It's Spider-Man and he's presumably in the Spider-verse. We follow a middle schooler named Miles. He lives a normal life and transfers to a new school, and of course, he gets bitten by a mutated spider because it's Spider-man. He watches as Spider-Man gets shot by this guy who I think is named Kingpin but I completely forget, and Miles is sad because Spider-Man is awesome. He then casually becomes Spider-Man and gets chased around by this creepy guy in a purple suit who, spoiler alert, is actually his uncle. We watch and say "wow, that guy's a jerk" until he doesn't kill Spider-Man and instead gets shot by Kingpin because he thinks the trigger on his gun feels nice. Spider-Mans from all universes come together to help Miles do stuff, and stuff they did. Some cool action scenes were placed, followed up by the most hilarious post-credits scene I've ever seen.
I really liked this movie. I always watched a Marvel movie every now and then, so I never planned to see this one. I ended up seeing it with some friends and I was hooked. The dramatic and comedic scenes were well balanced and brought about multiple plots. Seriously though, this movie is absolutely hilarious and soul-crushing at the same time. The funniest scene, other than after the credits, would have to be the funny Spider-Mans. Spider-Man Noir and Spider-Ham both gave me multiple moments of laughter. On the other hand, the scene where Miles couldn't move because he was stuck in a web while his dad was pouring his heart out to him through the door was about to make me cry. I then remembered that I'm an absolute alpha male who has no ability whatsoever to experience any emotions at all, so it didn't bring any tears to my eyes. This movie was amazing and I really enjoyed it, definitely would see it again in a few years from now. In this Christmas classic, the Arizona senator John McCain hears that his wife and some friends are captured by a German terrorist named Hans at a Christmas party in LA. *looks away from camera* wait, his name's John McClain? Why? That's so dumb. Ugh, let me restart. A police officer named John McClain doesn't get any response from the police, so he then goes to rescue his comrades by himself, Home Alone style. Except there were guns. Well, there were guns in Home Alone too, when that guy on the TV says "keep the change, you filthy animal", but that doesn't count. Anyways, this paragraph rambles because I just took in the simple version of the story and paid more attention to all of the action. I miss Action September.
Okay, this movie was amazing. I kind of included it into December as a joke, since everyone always argues if this is a Christmas movie, but I'm glad I did. I loved the centralized conflict that only took place in the plaza I believe. This made for some smart use of the space they were given. My favorite scene by far was when John walked towards the camera while Hans pointed his gun at his head. That one got my heart pumping. The gun scene right after Hans escaped was amazing. This movie is another case of 80's films that have aged really well. If compiled with a few modern CGI effects and enhanced quality, I think this could pass off as a movie in 2018. It's the 60's and a family gets lost and is picked up by a cult. As we know, the 60's were a "different time", and cults picked up people off the streets every day. The head of this cult is Manos, who presumably has hands, and his cult is full of women who think they have rights. Obviously a bunch of crazies. This Manos guy is creepy and talks to literally nothing at times, which is pretty sad. This cult tortures the family and wants to kill a child who came along with them, which is probably a relief to the parents. There was also this scene where this woman slapped this guy 5 times. It was pretty great.
Just for some context, last week I thought Time Chasers was "so bad, it's good", but with Manos, I didn't get the same vibe. I didn't like how it took place in the creepy woods and involved cults, I would have much rather made it as a lighthearted movie like Time Chasers. Wow, I miss Time Chasers. I feel the same way as many of the critics, who just panned this movie and didn't enjoy it at all. When the cult ladies started fighting, it just felt awkward and not even remotely funny. I wish I liked this more, but I just didn't. It honestly gave me a bad headache and I wanted to stop watching it as soon as I could. This was, by far, the worst movie I've ever seen, let alone this school year. It's the 90's and technology is so great, kids can ride their skateboards to school. Oh yeah, and time travel. Nick (Matthew Bruch) constructs a time travel device. Nick was going to use this for the good of humanity, but that would be pretty lame, told to do so by the CEO of a nature corporation, J.K. (George Woodard). When he tried to use his time machine, he almost destroys the planet. Nick then goes on to build another time machine, since of course that's a good idea ("hey, my first one nearly destroyed the universe, how will I fix this? Another time machine") and attempts to stop J.K. from coming up with the idea for the original time machine.
I've never googled so much about a movie in my life. I was beyond curious with all of the aspects of this movie, since it's criminally low-budget. Apparently, the whole movie was shot in Vermont, and wasn't even intended to premiere in theaters. Instead, it aired on the sci-fi TV series, Mystery Science Theater 3000. This was caused by my many observations, including "is this a movie?" and "did a dog direct this movie?". After all, this movie was amazingly terrible. I observed early on that this was a parody of BTTF2, whether intended or not. That alone made me forgive this movie of all of its wrongdoings. It's so innocent, they tried to make an amazing movie but didn't have enough money. I bet with more resources and time, the concept of this film could branch out into something extraordinary. I would definitely want to watch something with such a good concept. The lack of money showed in scenes like the shotgun scene, which would be really cool if it wasn't filmed with a toaster. Not to mention the airplane scene before the time traveling, which would be way cooler with more editing. Also, the commentary from the show hosts wasn't as annoying as I thought it would be. Overall, terrible movie, but great time. Especially the host commentary, which made fun of the movie more than I ever could have. It's the 90's and energy drinks are the new thing! Also, an American family vacations to a town that is infested with trolls instead of people. Of course, this is only believed by a young boy in the family named Joshua (Michael Stephenson), while his parents don't think there really are trolls in the town. They soon realize that they are wrong. They try to fight off these evil trolls with the spirit of Joshua's grandpa, I don't know, man, it was really weird.
I fell asleep during this movie. To give some context, I am an incredibly terrible napper. I can never fall asleep in the middle of the day because my brain runs a million miles an hour whenever I try to. This weekend consisted of a fall play and two big school projects I've been working on, and that really drained my energy. While watching the movie, the last time I checked how far I was in it was around 65 minutes in, and that's all I can remember. So, a movie causing me to fall asleep is really impressive. From what I do remember, the concept is badly funny and it made me laugh at the stupidity and utter laziness the director put into this film. Again, I had to shut off a part of my brain to accomplish it, but overall, though it was gross at times, I enjoyed it more than I expected. After looking at some reviews online, I can see that I have the same opinion as many others. Troll 2, I cannot remember much of what story you were telling or anything of the sort, but I do remember that you caused me to feel joy while watching a movie that has a 6% fresh rating. Will (Matt Lanter) wakes up from his dream consisting of a huge disaster: Amy Winehouse burping in his face for 35 seconds. Oh yeah, and the world was ending. He has a fallout with his girlfriend Amy (Vanessa Lachey) when he didn't tell her that he loved her. At his sweet sixteen party (even though he's 25), she brings her new boyfriend to it, a Calvin Klein model. The rest of the film is a mash of "hilarious" characters as they go around Armageddon and meet some pop culture icons from 2008.
So, this is the worst rated movie on IMDb, and that really surprises me. Yes, it was a pretty bad movie, but I wouldn't guess that it would be the worst at all. There were some parts that were stretched out too long and utterly gross, but there were few parts where I laughed out loud. The crystal skull from the 2008 Indiana Jones movie was a big part of the plot, and the man who played Indiana Jones was sort of funny. As well as Crista Flanagan, who played a pregnant teenager, who was actually funny at times, especially her song she sang with her partner at the beginning. I'd probably give the movie a 3.5 or 4 out of 10, instead of 1.9/10. It was bad, but not THAT bad. The 1970's were a wacky time, man. Adults trusted teenagers with watching their kids? That's the worst decision I've ever heard. Also, there's a killer named Michael Myers on the loose. When he was just 5 years old, he stabbed his older sister on Halloween night while in a clown costume. This put him in a mental facility, but after 15 years pass, he escapes by scaring a girl and taking her car. We then learn about a group of teenagers who don't even care that Halloween is a holiday, and a group of frightened kids. One of the teenagers (Jamie Lee Curtis, yeah, the one from Freaky Friday. Good touch, 1970's) is babysitting a little boy while her friends is babysitting a little girl in another house. They exchange phone calls throughout the night. This ends abruptly when Michael hops in the back of Annie's car and strangles her. Blonde girl then goes to the house that Annie was at to check on her, while Annie's friends go to the house blonde girl was at. This, of course, inhabits Michael, who murders the two teenagers while they're "getting it on". Blonde girl ventures to the house with all of the corpses and finds all of them laying in a sadistic manner planned out by Michael. This is followed by blonde girl thinking she kills Michael and then not really doing it, but the job is finished when Michael's old doctor comes and shoots him to death...
...or so they thought. Ok, this movie was outstanding. Literally everything I could ask from a horror movie. Just to give some context, over the month of October, I've watched both ITs, Friday the 13th, and Nightmare on Elm Street. They were all good, but nothing like this one. It had the character building from Friday the 13th, the slasher factor from Nightmare on Elm Street, and the eeriness from IT. Michael Myers is the perfect killer, hands-down. He doesn't just murder everything like Freddy, he actually plans his kills out so much. I watched this movie with my parents, and everytime we said that something would happen, it didn't. It was frustrating at the time, but it really goes to show that Halloween isn't predictable and always throws in a twist. Also, the fact that Michael appears and disappears out of nowhere was a really nice concept that I loved from the start. I can go on for hours, least favorite part was the lack of killing at the beginning, but in retrospect the first scene made up for it, and favorite part was every single time Michael crept up behind them and they didn't notice. Loved that. This movie is a 10/10 for a horror film. It may not be the most technical, or the deepest, but it sure gives the audience something to get caught up in and solidifies itself as a masterpiece. Taking place in the 1930's in London, we learn that there are multiple terrorist attacks with the use of explosives. Karl Verloc (Oscar Homolka) is a member of the group, but hides out in his own movie theater. His wife (Sylvia Sidney) begins to investigate his behavior, and so is Scotland Yard Detective Sgt. Ted Spencer (John Loder). We later find out that Verloc gets his wife's little brother to deliver the bombs with pieces of film.
This is the first mystery I've watched in a while, and I have to say, I really liked it. I've seen a handful of Hitchcock movies before this, and I definitely loved how he incorporated his famous style into this piece. The dinner scene was the most memorable, I just loved watching the mysterious dialogue between them. I could ramble on and on about the scenes I loved in this movie, which is why I don't understand why it's never really talked about. Many people have heard of Vertigo and Psycho. I've seen Vertigo and I can guarantee that the plot is much better in Sabotage. It's even reached Hollywood yet and went into his pieces of art. Anyways, I love how Hitchcock incorporated the wife's role into the story so smoothly. I could really tell, from a story standpoint, what she was thinking and what her intentions were. Overall, Sabotage was a great film and I believe everyone should go watch it. It's 1984 and a whole town of teenagers are having the same dream. This dream consisted of a man named Freddy Krueger with razor-sharp claws chopping the teenager up. The twist is, if they get cut in their dream, it translates over to the real world. This is shown by a gruesome scene of a girl surrounded by blood. This is ruled as a murder and her boyfriend was sent to jail. When he goes to sleep, Freddy visits him as well. While investigating the mysterious murders, we learn that Marge Thompson, our main character, cannot go to sleep in fear of Freddy paying her a visit. Her mother Nancy tells her of how Freddy Krueger exists in the real world and she burned him to death--or so he thought. Marge then goes on to burn Freddy to death again. It may have been a dream, I forget, reality and dreams are confusing in this film.
This movie freaked me out, especially for an '80s slasher film. The use of Freddy's claws looked so realistic and actually made me quite scared. The story wasn't exactly my favorite, I more or less enjoyed the murders and the final showdown, but overall, it was pretty solid. I loved how the killer had an identity and we got to learn about who he is and what he wants to do. I think this killer identity made me enjoy the film much more. Comparing it to Friday the 13th, we learned much less about the victims and more about the killer than that movie, and this one actually had the main killer in it. Overall, A Nightmare on Elm Street was a great slasher movie. The story didn't get good until Nancy joined the picture, but all of the killings were easily the most enjoyable part of this film and I would highly recommend it. In a secluded camp that was recently brought back to life, 6 camp counselors roam the grounds, ignoring all warning signs. These 6 people take advantage of the camp they have all to themselves and have a little fun along the way. One by one, they all get murdered by a mysterious figure, except one. The plot is as exciting as it sounds.
I wasn't impressed with this movie whatsoever as far as a scary movie goes. I did enjoy parts and it kept me engaged, but I think this film represents what everyone thinks of 80's horror movies. From today's standards, everything has gotten scarier, and that just makes Friday the 13th look like child's play. I wasn't expecting how much teenage angst that was present, I would much rather enjoy watching people get murdered than teenage angst. There were only 5 direct murders in the film and all of them kind of blew, except the one where the girl I was not emotionally invested in whatsoever got her head chopped off. Speaking of which, I did not sympathize with any character and didn't really care when they died. This really ruined the movie for me, especially how I never saw Jason's face when he was murdering them. Also, the jingle before he killed somebody was cheesy. I did enjoy the banter and attempts this movie made, but to be completely honest, I did not like this movie overall. I'm glad I watched it, since Friday the 13th is presumably a classic, and it really makes me concerned on how I wasn't allowed to watch this when I was little. It's literally not scary at all, cover up the nudity and a 5 year old could watch it entirely. |
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